Certain Girls

I spent the morning and half the afternoon reading Certain Girls by Jennifer Weiner. What a rip-off. I'd heard that it was really funny, but I couldn't find anything funny about it. I'm not really surprised- the first book had a fair bit of tragedy before finding a happy ending. There was no happy ending for this one. I sobbed my way through the last forty pages.

Spoilers Ahead.

Why did she have to kill Peter? What purpose did it serve in the story? None that I could see, other than a cheap way to wring tears out of the reader. It finally looks like the problems between Cannie and Joy have been worked out, and BAM! Her husband dies. At the end of the book she's lost her job and her husband. Joy, her 13 year-old daughter seems to be holding things together. She's written another book- one that's she's not too sure of and will likely cause more problems. And worst of all, she's got a brand new baby that I'm not convinced she ever wanted.

I don't mind a little tragedy in my books, but there's got to be an emotional payoff of some sort at the end. I'm sorry, there was no payoff for me in this book. No resolution. Just more misery. And a headache for me, from crying so hard.

And now I have to get it back to the library so it can make someone else miserable. Boy, am I glad I didn't read it at the beach house like I'd planned.

Is it weird?

So, I met this guy a couple of years ago. He was smart, nice, funny, had a cool job. I was definitely interested. In fact, he's the only guy I'd met in years that made me sit up and think "Wow!" And he seemed interested, too. We met through a writing group, and he always made a point to talk to me. There was even an email or two exchanged.

And then he just disappeared.

In this group that's not terribly unusual. Things get busy and life intrudes and people wander off. He's a few years older, and I know he had kids. Maybe it was just really bad timing. But I thought there was something there.

Is it too weird that I still think about this guy every once in a while?

New Knitty

The new Knitty is up. Yippie! And they've announced their 2009 calendar contest. I'm so new to the online knitting community that I didn't even know they had a calendar, let alone a contest to fill it. I'd love to enter, but if you've seen any of my pictures here on the blog, you know I am not one of the world's great photographers. Actually, I'm not bad. I just don't have a great camera. The light isn't so hot in my apartment, either. But I'm not spending a bunch of money on a new camera right now.

Also, I need to knit something to take a picture of. I should probably work on that part first, huh? I've got a pile of patterns I want to make, including a couple of sock patterns from the summer issue. This one is designed for self-striping yarn, and you know I love me some self-striping yarn. http://www.knitty.com/ISSUEsummer08/PATTmuscari.html I think that one is my favorite of the bunch.

As you may have guessed, I am back from vacation. I'm not up to blogging about it yet- maybe this weekend. I remembered to take my camera, but forgot to use it, so sorry. No pictures. Whoops!

An Annual Event

Brace yourselves, folks. I shaved my legs this morning. That's right, I've spent the last year as a hairy feminist. Not out of any particular political conviction (Although I'm proud to say I'm a feminist. What's up with all the women today who say they aren't feminists? Do you like being paid less for the same job or having others limit your access to reproductive care and birth control? Really now.), but because I've been too exhausted/lazy to deal with it. Let me tell you, it takes a lot of energy to shave that much acreage on a semi-regular basis.

You wouldn't believe the hassle in shaving off a year's worth of leg hair. First of all, it requires multiple razors. That much hair dulls the blades fast. If you want to leave the skin and remove the hair, you'd better be prepared to switch out at least half way through. And then there's the problem of missing spots. When you shave regularly and miss a spot, no one is going to notice a little stubble. (Unless they're feeling on your legs, in which case Good For You!) When you've got a year's worth of leg hair and you miss a spot, it's visible from space. I think I got it all, but I guarantee I'll find a big ol' spot when I put on my shorts at the beach tomorrow. Whoops!

I can't wait to get there. I missed the beach house last year because I was in the hospital. I was so damn sick I hardly even regretted it at the time. All I wanted to do was lie there. Even if they'd sprung me, I couldn't have managed the trip. This year it may not be all good- things have been a little rough again this week- but it's a hell of a lot better than last year.

I even remembered to pack my camera, so maybe I'll have a few pictures to post next week!

Why did I do that?

I made a big mistake. I've been eating junk food this week, and now I'm paying for it. Big time. I've been in the bathroom approximately eight hundred thirty-two times today, and as soon as I'm done posting this it'll be back to the throne room. I just hope things settle down in time for me to drive to the beach Friday night. Crohn's bites big wang.

fortune telling yarn and other stuff

I've been knitting bibs and burp cloths for a friend who's due in October. As you may have seen in a previous post, I have a boatload of Peaches n Creme yarn. Many, many colors. And yet, I couldn't make myself knit anything in girlie colors. Every time I pulled a skein out of a bag, it was blue or green or some combination of the two. I told a mutual friend, "I know it's too early to know for sure, but I think she's having a boy." I just got an email today- I was right! She's having a boy. My reputation for woo woo is secure.

I've finally settled on my knitting projects for the beach this weekend. I'm going to take the sock that I'm currently Magic Looping (My first! It doesn't look so great, but since this is my first pair in fingering weight yarn I'm trying to accept that it's a learning experience.) and yarn to start another. I'm most of the way through the leg at this point, so it's entirely possible that I will finish this sock and want to start another. I just need to pick which of the nine skeins of sock yarn I want to work next. (Did I mention I accidentally bought more sock yarn last weekend? Whoopsie!)

I'm almost settled on the reading material, too. Definitely the new Harry Dresden. Probably the Lois McMaster Bujold. I'm waffling on The Host by Stephenie Meyer. It's a big book, and my hands have been hurting lately. Also, it's likely to get beat up, spilled on, ashed on, and generally abused, and I hate to do that to a new, pretty hardback. That I paid money for myself. Also, I'm trying to keep the personal entertainment down to one tote bag, and that sucker is big. So probably the Meyer will wait 'til later.

Speaking of Lois McMaster Bujold, I've been listening to the Vorkosigan series on audiobook again. I'm on my second listening of Cetaganda, and I plan to download the next book in time to listen to it on my drive down. Let me just say, I love Miles Vorkosigan. I would so totally marry him if he weren't already married. (And if he were real instead of a fictional character, of course.) I heard Bujold is working on another book in the series for release in 2009. Yippie! This world is so real, it seems like there are infinite possibilities for the author. I'd love to see Ivan's POV- what was it like growing up with Miles? I don't think Ivan is nearly as dumb as he pretends to be. As much as Miles feels overshadowed by the tall, handsome Ivan, I'm sure Ivan's felt just as overshadowed by cunning Miles, who grew up with two doting parents. In fact, I've wondered how Gregor felt, too, boy Emperor and foster brother to such an overwhelming personality. Alys Vorpatril has hidden depths, and her insider's view of Barrayar and a woman's place in the society and power structure would be interesting. And Byerly Vorrutyer was intriguing in A Civil Campaign, although I'm not sure I'm ready to read a whole book about him. Ellie Quinn or Bel Thorne would be interesting POV characters, too. Not that I wouldn't be perfectly happy with more Miles! (And I bet his kids will give him a run for his money someday soon, too!)

mano a mano

This past weekend, for no particular reason, I left the TV off and read. That hasn't happened in quite a while. I guess I've just been so caught up in knitting that I haven't wanted to put the needles down and read. So last weekend, while the Tivo recorded NCIS and SVU marathons, I snuggled in bed with the cat and a few books.

Again, it wasn't any particular plan, but what I ended up reading was m/m romance. I'd never read one before. Well, that's not true. I've read Force of Nature and All Through the Night, Suzanne Brockmann's novels featuring Jules and Robin. But the bedroom door is firmly closed in those books. In the books I read this weekend the bedroom door was wide open.

The first one was My Fair Captain by J.L. Langley. It's an interesting concept. Although space fairing, a couple planets have chosen to base their societies on Regency England. One has a completely male dominated aristocracy. And they're all gay. The young men must guard their virtue until marriage or until they come of age at 25. The reasoning behind the all male aristocracy was weak. But if you're willing to not think about it too hard and just be entertained, the rest of the world works. The writing could have used more polishing, too, but other than that I enjoyed it.

The second book was Phyllida and the Brotherhood of Philander by Ann Herendeen. This one I have more mixed feelings about. It's a bisexual Regency. Andrew is a "sodomite" who has decided it's time to marry and produce an heir. A friend introduces him to Phyllida as a woman who might be willing to marry him and still allow him to continue his lifestyle. Of course, they are immediately attracted to each other. After they marry, Andrew meets Matthew and they fall in love as well. My main problem with this book was that there was just too much going on. Andrew acts like an insensitive jerk and a whole series of unnecessary misunderstandings ensue, leaving Andrew and Phyllida estranged for a good chunk of the book. There's a whole espionage subplot that doesn't make much sense until a minor character explains the whole thing at the end. Andrew and Matthew have what seemed to me to be a pointless fist fight right before resolving their romantic conflict. At 532 pages, this book was at least 150 pages too long. For all that, I didn't dislike the book. I guess I'd heard so many good things about it online, my expectations were too high. I wish the love triangle among Phyllida, Andrew, and Matthew was more even. It seems to me that the only one who got everything s/he wanted/needed out of the deal was Andrew.

Then last night, I read Fairyville by Emma Holly. Let me just say, Emma Holly is hot. She can write a steaming sex scene, and this book was no different. I haven't read all of her stuff, but this was the first book of hers I've read that featured a m/m couple who ended up in a more or less committed relationship. Zoe, a professional medium, lives in Fairyville, Arizona, a city known for its strange goings on. Magnus is a fairy living in the human world and hiding from his mother, the fairy queen. Alex is Zoe's lost love, and although he doesn't know it at first, a changeling. Bryan is Alex's business partner who has been in love with him since college. And then they all get it on. A lot. I didn't quite buy Magnus' reason for hiding his nature from Zoe, and I wasn't 100% on the Zoe/Alex relationship. But other than that, I enjoyed this book quite a lot. Holly has a gift for writing very hot sex scenes that also illuminate the charcters and advance the plot, all at the same time. Not an easy thing to do. I checked out her website and discovered that she has a writing workshop posted there. Believe me, I will be reading that.

After stepping back and considering all three, I've realized that they all have one thing in common- D/s themes. Is this because these books are already considered edgy because of the m/m content, so it's OK to go there? Is it because women are writing these books, and the idealized romantic hero is an aggressive alpha male, and that's being expressed through domination? Did I just get lucky and end up with three kinky heroes? More research is required. I did notice that both Andrew and Nate (in Captain) called their lovers "sluts." Is this also a m/m thing, or just a coincidence? Is this something that women want to hear but is socially unacceptable, even in our erotica, so we put it in a m/m relationship? Who are we supposed to be relating to, the dominant or the dominated?

A lot to think about. And this is just the tiniest tip of the genre-iceberg. If anyone has any suggestions for further reading, I'd love to hear them.

Last Night I Had a Crazy Dream.....

I had an Ugly Betty dream last night. In it, I was dating Daniel and we were hanging out at Betty's apartment. (I know, she lives with her family, but in my dream she had an apartment.) Daniel and I were really schmoopy, which anyone who's known me for 5 minutes knows is totally not normal for me. Then his phone rang. His ring tone was Angel by Madonna. (I know that's dumb. It'll make more sense in minute.) So he answers the phone, and I can tell he doesn't want to talk to whoever it is in front of me. So Betty and I go into the kitchen to hang out and talk. I suspect he's talking to another woman, and I'm trying not to get jealous. Even though he answered the phone, the music is still playing and Betty and I start dancing in the kitchen and then go into the dining room/sun room where there's more room to dance. And then an old woman with bad teeth appears and starts dancing with us. Just at the end of the song Daniel comes in and catches us busting a move. And then we get schmoopy again, although I can tell he's worried about something. And then I woke up and realized that it was 6:30 and my alarm clock was playing my Like a Virgin CD- hence the Madonna song. Weird, huh? No clue what it means, except maybe I've been watching too much TV. I've been bopping along humming Madonna songs all day. Good thing it was a high energy song, 'cause it's been a zoo around here.

My annual beach pilgrimage is coming up in a couple of weeks. I can't take the whole week. I don't want to use up that much time, just in case something happens later this year. Also, I don't think I have the stamina to spend that much time staying up late and eating unusual food. I don't want to kick off another flare. So I'll be there for 4 days. I have a couple of books picked out- The Host by Stephenie Meyer, Small Favors by Jim Butcher, The Curse of Chalion by Lois McMaster Bujold. But I haven't settled on what knitting I want to bring. It has to be something that I won't mind getting smoky. (I can't smoke anymore, but a lot of my friends do.) So anything for Project Linus or family Christmas gifts are out. It also needs to be something that doesn't require a lot of counting or pattern checking. We're a rowdy bunch, and there's no way I'll be able to keep up with anything fancy. I was thinking maybe the No Purl Monkeys (one of the June Thrifty Sock Knitters patterns) and maybe some face cloths for myself out of the Cotton Tots I broke down and bought before Mother's Day. I'm thinking the faux-Noro scarf is a bad idea- from what I hear SWS felts easily, and there's a high probability of spilled beer and general abuse. Perhaps Square Cake from Knitty out of some red tweed Wool Ease. I don't know. I'll probably change my mind eight times between now and then. Any suggestions?

New Dreams

I had a half hour pilates session with my trainer last night. Have I mentioned that I love pilates? I think it's the breathing. It's more like moving meditation than exercise. The reformers at my gym are in a small, curtained off room that's surprisingly quiet considering there are whole rows of treadmills and elliptical machines just a few feet away.

I'm thinking that maybe I'd like to be a pilates instructor some day. That's how much I love it. I talked to my trainer about "graduating" from beginner to intermediate last night, and she said that I'll be moving to "essential" next. (I thought that essential was a more basic beginner's class.) Most people take a year to move up to intermediate. So I'm thinking that it's going to be quite a while before I'm ready to try an instructor program. Usually, I'm kind of impatient with this kind of idea. I want to do it NOW. But strangely, I don't mind waiting. I'm content to take my Monday night reformer class, and if I feel up to it I'll try the Wednesday night small equipment class next week. It's all good.

I opened an email from Lion Brand today and found a short essay and pattern for a "road scarf." The essay didn't amount to much, but the pattern has inspired me. I haven't worked on a scarf in quite a while. I have a couple different scarf ideas- I wouldn't go so far as to say patterns- that I'd like to try. There's something sort of zen about a scarf. It just keeps going until it's done. There's not a whole lot of need for scarves in Houston. In fact, there's not as much need for hand knits in general as I'd like around here. (Although a good cozy sweater comes in surprisingly handy during the summer. Houston office a/c can be brutal.) But I'm already trying to figure out how many scarves I can pack and bring with me for Christmas in Massachusetts.

Plans for the weekend:
work on the book
watch Buffy
get a massage
breathe
knit

Is it really only Tuesday?

I'm thinking that pilates last night wasn't such a good idea. Owie. Also, I feel like I could sleep for a week. Even though it's only Tuesday, the weekend can't come soon enough.

I finished project #4- the burp cloth- at lunch today. The ends need to be woven in, but the kid's not due until October, so I have time!

Now that I'm down to one active project- the diagonal baby blanket- I'm completely obsessed with the idea of making a felted bag. This is the one I've been ogling on Rav- http://yarnpirate.livejournal.com/14995.html. Isn't it beautiful? I followed the link to her design inspiration, a pillow in gorgeous colors. And suddenly I'm envisioning this bag in Noro Kureyon. Can you imagine? Or perhaps Patons SWS. (Cheaper, and I already have a boatload of the Stripes. I'd just need a coordinating solid.) I was thinking about experimenting with something smaller and using up the last of my Silk Garden, but I hear it doesn't really felt. So much for that idea. I have a few other design ideas percolating, too.

I feel a trip to the LYS coming on. Danger, Will Robinson!

Progress Report

I finished 3 of my 5 projects this weekend- including weaving in the ends! Yay! Here are the pictures:

I think the swiffer sweater is a little loose, but I'll have to try it out to be sure. The burp cloth/kitchen towel is about 3/4 finished. I didn't get anything done on the baby blanket at all. It was very hard not to cast on for something else. I really want to make another market bag. But not until the other two projects are done! I feel so virtuous.

The doctor cleared me to go off the Predinsone on Saturday, so I did. Oy. I took a 2 hour nap yesterday and an hour nap today. After sleeping in until 10am. I have a feeling that tomorrow isn't going to be pretty.

Finish It Up!

I have 5, count 'em, 5 projects OTN at the moment:

1. Granny's Favorite in Spring Meadows P&C
2. ballband dishcloth in black and Fiesta P&C
3. ballband swiffer cover in Peppercorn P&C
4. Baby Genius burp cloth in Shaded Denim P&C
5. diagonal baby blanket in white Caron

It wouldn't be so bad if I were making progress on any of them, but with the exception of the Granny's Favorite, I've been piddling around with them all for over a week now. I'll do a row of this and a row of that, and nothing is getting done. So I've declared this my first, official Finish It Up Weekend. At least 3 of these projects will be completed by the time I go back to work on Monday.

I've decided to work on this the same way you're supposed to pay off your credit cards- starting with the project with the least left to do and working your way up to the ones with the most left. That way, you feel like you're accomplishing something. Yes, if I really worked my butt off I might be able to finish the baby blanket this weekend. Maybe. But then I'd still have 4 projects OTN, and I'd be burned out to boot. I can easily finish the GF tonight, and probably make some decent progress on the ballband dishcloth. Tomorrow morning I have my RWA meeting, and I'm not sure what I'll take to that. Probably either the burp cloth or the blanket. They aren't next on the list, but I won't have to wrestle multiple balls of yarn like the dishcloth or measure to make sure I'm not going too far like on the swiffer cover. (I'm not 100% sure how many rows I want on that one. It's better if I keep the swiffer handy so that it fits.)

Saturday I'll finish the dishcloth and swiffer cover, and Sunday I'll work on the burp cloth. If I take the burp cloth with me on Saturday morning, I might have a fighting chance of finishing that on Sunday. So that will leave me with one project OTN. The diagonal baby blanket. If I work on that exclusively in the evenings next week, I might be able to finish it, too. Then I can cast on for a Jayne hat, or a meathead, or that baby hat from Creative Knitting that I've been wanting to make, or maybe the Rosie the Riveter.... can you tell I'm in a hat mood? But before I do all that, Must Finish the WIPs!

It's 2008 People!

My boss is a turd.

We had a temp come in for training today and to cover for me tomorrow while I'm out for my Remicade treatment. This morning, when I told him that the temp would be a guy, he said "Oh, shit." I kid you not. And then he muttered around about how we always get "the dregs." And then he came out of his office and said something to the effect of "Not to be sexist or anything, but I want a woman answering the phone. If I wanted a guy answering the phone I'd do it myself." Then there was more muttering, and "If he's gay, I don't want him in here!"

The things he was saying were really shitty, but I have to admit I totally enjoyed how upset he got, in a passive aggressive way. What a dickhead. By the way, does anyone know on what planet boobs are required to answer the phone? It's not like I answer it with my hoo-ha.

Fortunately, the guy was very nice. Just out of college and temping while he looks for a job in his field. And apparently he was "non-gay" enough for the boss to allow him in the office. I don't know how he expected to get rid of him if he was gay. I've ditched temps for him before when they were legitimately not qualified. (I have to admit, we have had a few "dregs" before. It's the New Millennium. Computer skills, people!) But I was absolutely not going to call a temp agency and ditch a temp because Mr. Big Shot didn't like their sex or sexual orientation. If this guy was qualified and he wanted him out anyway, he was going to have to make that call himself.

If it weren't for the amazingly awesome insurance at this place, I'd be so gone. The sexism, the racism, the homophobia-- it's all wearing me out. How can insurance be worth all that hassle, you ask? It's simple. My insurance covers everything-- at least everything I've come across so far-- at 100%. Remember that Remicade treatment I mentioned earlier? That's a $10,000 treatment. I shit you not. I get that treatment every 8 weeks. If I had 80/20 insurance (which I've had before) I would pay $2,000 a treatment. x6=$12,000 a year. Do you have $12,000 laying around for routine medical expenses? I sure don't. The base price for my 2 weeks in the hospital last year was $50,000. That doesn't include all the tests-- the colonoscopy, the upper GI and small bowel follow through, the MRI. (Actually, I think I had 2 MRIs. It's all a little fuzzy.) I could have owed $10,000 just for the stay. That's probably not my last hospital stay either, although I'd be perfectly happy if it was.

So how do you stand on principle when it could mean health crisis and bankruptcy? I'm going to have to either find another job with the same level of insurance or win the lottery. These days, I'm not sure which is a longer shot. Wish me luck.

Writing

I spent about an hour tonight working on the book. I went through the 5 pages I presented to my critique group last time (or critique partner I guess I should say, since only one other person was able to come last time) and edited out a half dozen justs. (Apparently I use it a lot. A forgivable sin, considering this was a NaNo novel. As long as they're ruthlessly edited out.) And then I added another 3 pages. I want to add a couple more pages and then do my own editing before handing it over to the group again later this week. I think we're all going to be there this time!

The next bit is basically Daisy and Robert sitting in his office and talking. Again. I've taken the chain saw to the previous blah, blah, blah scenes and I'm sure this one will need the same. But this is still the beginning of the book. Daisy has just been dropped into a world she knows nothing about. Someone has to explain to her (and the reader) what the heck is going on. I just (there goes that word again) don't want to over do it. So we'll see.

Whoopsie! And also, Hooray!

I had a little bit of Cotton Tots left over from making face cloths for my parents for Mother's Day and Father's Day, so I decided to make a mitered square face cloth based on the pattern in Mason Dixon Knitting.



As you can see, it may be mitered, but it sure ain't square. I wonder how that happened? The pattern is for a stockinette square, but I did it all in garter stitch instead. I've done this pattern once before with no problems. Except of course for the fact that stockinette rolls like mad, so it needs blocking to lay flat. I don't see the point in that for a face cloth. Also, I think the nubby texture of garter stitch is better for a face cloth than stockinette. I guess as long as no one minds a kite-shaped face cloth, we're OK. It's... supposed to be like that. Yeah! Why is everyone so hung up on the square? It's time for a little creativity around here!

Is it getting a little deep in here? Moving on....

I forgot to mention it, but the last post was my 50th. Hooray for me! I've been entertaining myself and boring my readers (all two of you) for just over seven months now. If only I were this dedicated to exercise!

I watched The Golden Compass over the weekend. I feel a little eh about it. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, because that's the way I felt about the book.

This is where I wrote a rambling digression about Christianity that probably would have gotten me flamed, so I'm just going to say that the whole "this movie was anti-Christian" was a tempest in a teapot and move on, OK?

The movie ended a chapter or two before the book did, which I heard some complaints about from hard core fans. But for once, I think the movie makers were smart in deviating from the book. The ending was logical- Lyra saved her friend and all the other kids- and the set up for the next movie is obvious- she has to save her father from her mother and the evil Magisterium. Much better than the book's ending, which didn't work for me at all. I haven't read book two yet, but I've got the audio book on reserve at the library. Considering my reaction to book one, I don't have high hopes, but hey. It's something to listen to while driving.

Hooray for May!

The mounted patrol was back in my neighborhood last night, and I didn't get pulled over. I told you! It's all April's fault! TGIM.

In the comments, Carat asked about the Can't Stop the Serenity event I mention in the last post. (Hi, Carat!) Houston's event was just announced for July 6th. That's Sunday of the July 4th weekend. For those who've never heard of it, CStS is a screening of the movie Serenity, often with associated auctions or raffles, to benefit Equality Now. Details at: http://cantstoptheserenity.com/ There are many of these events around the country, and even around the world, all year long, so don't feel left out if 4th of July in Houston (HOT) isn't your thing.

I'm so happy that Ugly Betty is back! I had pilates last night, so I wasn't able to watch it live and have my usual post-Betty dish with my mom. We'll have to do that tonight. Anyone else watch it? I felt bad for Daniel at the end. He doesn't want Betty, but he wants loving relationships like she has, and someone who is good to him like she is to everyone. (To skip back a week, I thought it was so sweet that he gave her birthday present to her father weeks in advance, knowing that he would forget when the day came.) There was a moment last season, when Betty and Daniel were on a bridge, talking after a long night, and there was a real moment of chemistry between them. I was afraid that they were going to try to put the two of them together, and was glad they didn't go there. Maybe it was just a moment of chemistry between the two actors? (Although I read recently that Eric Mabius's wife just had a baby, so I don't know what to think of it.) Anyway, I like how far Daniel has come in the last season and a half. He was a real butthead in the first episode or two- mainly I think because he was rich and handsome and no one had ever called him on his crap before, not because he didn't have a good heart in there somewhere.

Christian Siriano and his "hot trannie mess" cracked me up. And Amanda adding herself to the fashion show.

I'm waiting to see how they resolve the Henry/Gio situation, too. At this point, I think Gio is much better for Betty than Henry. She's going to get her heart broken there, big time.

Chilling Out

As you can tell by my previous posts, the last few days haven't been so great for me. I've made a conscious decision to Chill Out. It's just April. I know this by now. April doesn't love me, and I'm not too fond of her, either. (Previous April disasters- lost a job, totaled a car, had surgery that led to a major health crisis. If it happens to me, and it's life-alteringly bad, it happens in April.)

The apartment is dry, at least for the moment. Hopefully for good. It still smells like Juicy Fruit, now with an overlay of floral yuck (maintenance was in again yesterday afternoon), but it's dry. And the cat has calmed down and started demanding food again. So I'm going to try to let it go. Tomorrow is May! Whoopie!

I'm part of a stash busting group on Ravelry (which you can see from previous posts I really need), and the May challenge is to knit with cotton. Being me, I spent all of April in an obsessive compulsive cotton dishcloth frenzy, so I'm ready to move on to something else. Instead, I have decided to declare May Acrylic Month. That's right, I'm going to take a crack at knitting up the piles and piles of Caron (and a little bit of Red Heart, I'm ashamed to say) that I've acquired in the last year or so. I have a blanket for Project Linus on the needles, which I plan to finish. I have a head scarf for a friend that I want to make. I promised a couple of Jayne hats for auction at the Houston Can't Stop the Serenity event in July. (I further promise to follow an actual pattern and not try to invent it on the fly as I did last time. Whoops!) I also want to make a few hats either for local homeless shelters or to send up to my parents' church in Boston for their program. Houston may not get as cold as New England, but I'm sure there are still plenty of people who could use a warm hat in January. I'm also knocking around the idea of making a Pretty Punk blanket (http://www.therunningyarn.com/2008/04/pretty-punk-blanket-free-pattern.html) in non-pretty, macho-manly colors for a friend who dearly loves all things skeleton and death metal related. The good news is that I may very well have all the yarn I need for that blanket already in my stash! I'd also like to make a baby hat from the December (?) issue of Creative Knitting.

And I'm recommitting myself to No Yarn Purchases for the month of May. Everybody's got to have a goal.

Let's see... that's at least seven projects, maybe more, and two of them are blankets. It won't all get finished, but I should burn through a few skeins in the stash. Woo hoo!

A little rant to brighten your day

I have had it. HAD IT.

I came home for lunch today to discover that maintenance had been in the apartment. How do I know maintenance was in the apartment? They certainly didn't leave any kind of note, as their supposed to. No. It was the amazing, unbelievable STENCH. Someone came in a sprayed something that smells like the bastard stepchild of paint thinner and Juicy Fruit gum. Swear to god. I almost gagged when I walked in. So I opened all the windows and called the main office to complain. No one came by to do anything about it or even check it out. I ended up missing the whole afternoon of work because I live on the first floor and couldn't leave the windows open while I'm gone. And there was no way I could close them up. It's 9:30 at night and it still stinks to high heaven.

So I decided to make a grocery run at 8:30 this evening. It was dark out, and time to close the windows, and anyway I wanted cake. So I close everything up and go out to my car. And what do I find? Someone from this bastard apartment complex has STICKERED MY CAR. Apparently while I was STUCK AT HOME MISSING WORK AND AIRING OUT MY SMELLY ASS APARTMENT they decided to brighten my day with a permanent orange warning sticker. Bastards. It's not bad enough that my apartment floods twice in what? A month? Six weeks? And I miss work because they've sprayed toxic levels of god knows what in here without informing me about it. Now they've got to put a giant ass orange sticker on my car, threatening to tow it? Rat bastards. I'm going in tomorrow to talk to the manager. If anyone so much as LOOKS FUNNY at my car, they're going to wish they'd never been born.

I'm a pretty even tempered person. I'd even go so far as to say that I'm easy to push around. I don't like confrontation. But I strongly suggest that no one FUCK WITH ME for the next few days. Even I have a limit.

The Great Flood of '08

Living in a first floor apartment has many benefits. You don't have to haul your groceries up a dozen flights of stairs. You stay cooler in the summer. It generally costs less to move. But there is one great disadvantage. Anytime one of your upstairs neighbors has a water leak, you get flooded out. Yesterday, around 5 o'clock, my upstairs neighbor's water heater sprung a leak. This was the result.

It flooded the hallway, the linen closet, the bathroom, and the kitchen. The water also crept into the bedroom and the dining room. Every towel in the house was used to sop up the mess, and it still wasn't enough.

It started off just pouring down through the ceiling of the water heater/ac closet. I called maintenance, and 45 minutes later someone showed up. He went upstairs and got the water shut off, which stopped it, sort of. Then he used a shop vac to suck up some of the water, and told me someone else would be by in another 45 minutes to take up the carpet and padding, since they were both completely soaked.

I took the opportunity to grab some dinner, since it was now after 7pm. About five minutes after I finished eating there was a popping noise, and water was gushing out under the closet door again. I opened the door, expecting to see part of the ceiling collapsed or something, but a pipe had blown out, and steaming water was rushing everywhere. I called maintenance and the same guy came back again. Apparently, the upstairs water heater was at it again. This pipe was supposed to handle the condensation from the upstairs ac units. I'm guessing the temperature of the water (not to mention the quantity) was more than it could handle, and that's why it blew.

He put the pipe back together and went back upstairs to turn off the water again. It blew again. He came back and tried to put it together, this time with glue. It blew again. Then the second maintenance guy showed up to deal with the carpeting, and had a fit because there was still water gushing everywhere. (If you think this all sounds like "The Three Stooges Do Home Repair," you are correct.) He hauled in the super-duper water sucking hose and went to work. That's when we discovered that the kitchen pantry had flooded, too. Then the first guy came back and replaced the pipe that kept busting and left. The second guy yanked up about half my carpeting and removed all the carpet padding, which was completely sopping by this point. Then he said he'd be back in a few days to replace the padding and clean the carpet, and to try not to flood anything else. A comedian. Ha.

My apartment finally cleared of all carpet padding and maintenance guys around 9pm- four hours after the water first started coming through the ceiling. It was another two hours before I could coax the cat out from under the covers on the bed. He was, and still is, completely wigged out. He keeps doing this weird hyperventilating thing, and he hasn't eaten anything since it happened. He kept me up all night by walking across my pillow and stepping on my head, when he wasn't hiding under the covers with me. He won't settle anywhere, and keeps meowing and doing the butt-down slink all over the apartment, like he expects maintenance guys and evil super vacuum cleaners to pop up again at any moment. He's making me nuts.

And the apartment is a wreck, too.

Oh, hell.

I got pulled over on the way home from work today. By a cop on a horse. How humiliating is that? The ticket was inexpensive, as tickets go, but I also have to pay to correct the problem so I won't get another ticket. Crap.

To do penance, and replace the money I'll be spending on the ticket and car stuff, I'm now grounded from spending money on eating out or entertainment. (Yarn and all related products included.) I checked my bank statement, and it took me 37 days to spend an amount equal to what I now owe on fun stuff. So from now until May 31 I'm stuck with the books I already own, the yarn I already have, food I've cooked for myself, and cable. (I was already on yarn restriction, but I was getting close to cracking. How sad is that? But it was for a Mother's Day gift, honest....)

I had big plans for today's blog, but now I'm not in the mood. Maybe this weekend.